Why do people cheat?
Posted by controversial1 on November 22, 2008
Why do people cheat? First off, we need to come to a conclusion as to what “cheating” entails. Is it sex? Is it the transfer of emotional intimacy to another outside of the “committed” relationship? Is it looking at another person? Is it cybersex, pornography, phone sex? Is it all of the aforementioned?
Regardless of how we describe cheating, why do people do it?
1. They can’t help it
2. They are trying to be devious
3. It is the “in” thing to be doing
4. It was agreed upon between the two parties
5. It is in their nature to cheat
6. They are not satisfied
7. They want to try something new
8. For pleasure
9. Testing the waters
10. They are greedy, selfish, heartless people that don’t care about others
11. Dissatisfaction
12. Money
13. Boredom
14. They don’t know what they want
15. Opportunity
16. Abuse by partner
17. Lack of love for or from partner
18. Thrills
19. Better or more sex
20. Greed
21. Because lust is tempting
22. Because they can
23. No reason
24. Lack of faith in God
25. Temptation
26. Seduction
27. Availability
28. Just because
29. Emotional withdrawal
30. Loneliness
31. Logistics
32. Power
33. Lack of excitement in current relationship
34. More open minded sex
35. Insecurity
36. Flirting gone awry
37. Sexual addiction
38. Fantasy
39. Games
It would appear there are many reasons or excuses as to why people cheat on their partners, but I would think that there are underlying reasons that lead to the ones listed above.
An individual goes into a relationship without really knowing his partner, then, he discovered that she’s totally different from whom he thought she was or she doesn’t possess the qualities he’s looking for in a woman after all.
He finds it difficult to break up even though he realizes he’s actually not in love with her; he doesn’t want to hurt her feelings.
So he keeps her in his life under false pretence but keeps floating around to see if he’ll eventually get that lady his mind is after.
Another factor is that he may not want to leave her because he feels insecure. He needs someone else but afraid to lose what he already has in case he doesn’t readily find that someone. Men are famous for looking for another WHILE in a relationship, knowing full well they will leave once they have established enough of a connection. Sometimes a man will have a great “wife and mother to the children” at home, a perfect “home base” for security so he can go out and “play” all the while having a stable back-up.
Why do people NOT cheat on their partners?
1. Fear of being caught
2. Fear of God
3. Respect for their partner and their commitment
4. For the children
5. For appearances
6. Loving bond
7. Satisfying sex life
8. Found the “perfect” partner
9. Lack of opportunity
Your comments and sharing of your opinions and experience on this subject are appreciated.
Scapadas said
People cheat for all of the above..I think no one is free of adultery..the temptation is all around us…and we always want to find out if the grass is greener on the other side.
Skrog said
In my situation after getting married most of the discussions of how to treat one other were forgotten. Having a wift that hen pecks at everything I do and constant barrage of insults has led me to go find someone else. Should I divorce? Sure if I knew the kids would be OK. What I mean is if I knew they would be picked up from school and properly cared for, by my divorcing it would allow my spouse to find someone else to help raise my kids. That won’t happen without a fight. In the meantime my wife has not touched me nor allowed me to touch her in Seven Years! It just sucks.
So occasionally I run intor women who have the same cold shoulder marriage as I do. We get together and see where it goes. It really goes at all levels.
Cheating while having a cold shoulder is justified.